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Post by EightSlicesOfPie on Oct 14, 2003 16:11:13 GMT -5
Hey!  I just wanted to know if anyone liked my storyline. I have the beginning, middle, and end. Here it is! Story Beginning: It's a rainy day in Duago Town and your mom wants to make a fire. The item shop is closed, so you have to go to the woods. At the end of the woods, you find some spare wood, but a man named General Raig and his two Crimson Knights accuse you of killing General Carr. After you fight, you run back to Duago but it was burned down, so you run away. Story Middle: In Wayon Town, you hear a story called the Chronicle of Utlaet. It's about an unholy creature that is made by fusing Ifrit, Shiva, Ramuh, Bahamut, Fraedal, Rakshura, Leviathan, and Carbuncle. A man named Xaer Kurieama comes to town and you find out he is planning to make Utlaet. You have to find the eight Gods who disguised themselves as humans before Xaer does. Story end: In an unknown place called Aiag, you and your three comrades face Xaer, you makes Utlaet. You beat it, and Xaer absorbs Utlaet's power and turns into the Dark Element. You have to fight Dark Element's 3 forms, then the game is over. Please tell me what you think! ;D |
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Post by Chickensoupcheese on Oct 14, 2003 16:15:07 GMT -5
You shouldn't tell people your game's ending, otherwise they haven't as much incentive to play it.
Otherwise, it's not a particularly outstanding story, but if it's a basis for a plot of one of your first projects, then it's fine (it'd make a fairly simple but fun game if done right I'd think). Just change the FF names into something else =D.
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Post by EightSlicesOfPie on Oct 14, 2003 16:28:12 GMT -5
Alright! I'll try to think of some other names...............................  |
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Post by The~Inquisitor on Oct 14, 2003 16:31:45 GMT -5
Please! please! please! Do not have the old there's some soldiers and your hometown gets burned down story.
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Post by Chickensoupcheese on Oct 14, 2003 17:09:21 GMT -5
It's a good enough storyline to get yourself up to scratch with the Making Tools. Perhaps leave the town standing, but turn all the villagers against the supposed traitor/hero.
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Atolmazel
RPG Townie
"That's one spicy tamale"
Posts: 650
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Post by Atolmazel on Oct 15, 2003 8:34:17 GMT -5
You should probably add a twist somewhere. Like the main character turns out to unwittingly be one of the eight gods who erased his own memory. Or make the plot a bit more complex. And no fire towns!
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Post by EightSlicesOfPie on Oct 15, 2003 19:53:35 GMT -5
thanks Atolmazel i think i might use that thing with him being one of the gods...........prob. Fraedal, who is the most important of the eight. if anyone has anymore suggestions, please post! i want my first RM2K game to be good (maybe just OK), but not a piece of crap!!!  hey i thought of some new names: Ifrit=Liegro Shiva=Jelai Bahamut=Tarai Ramuh=Huura Carbuncle=Faraii Leviathan=Durra |
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Atolmazel
RPG Townie
"That's one spicy tamale"
Posts: 650
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Post by Atolmazel on Oct 16, 2003 4:57:50 GMT -5
thanks Atolmazel i think i might use that thing with him being one of the gods...........prob. Fraedal, who is the most important of the eight. if anyone has anymore suggestions, please post! i want my first RM2K game to be good (maybe just OK), but not a piece of crap!!! hey i thought of some new names: Ifrit=Liegro Shiva=Jelai Bahamut=Tarai Ramuh=Huura Carbuncle=Faraii Leviathan=Durra Cool, and make all those names mean something in an ancient language or something. |
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Post by EightSlicesOfPie on Oct 16, 2003 7:02:00 GMT -5
I took Atolmazel's advice (again) and came up with a few words in my own little language thing in the game! It's called Leguidone. Fuu=Hello Keil=Stop Daide=Human Frea=Life Dal=Death Liegro=Fire Demon Jelai=Ice Demon Tarai=Wind Demon Huura=Thunder Demon Faraii=Healing Demon Duura=Water Demon Rak=Power Shura=Goddess Nendai=Black Rur=Red Bleg=Blue Yulai=Yellow Pikew=Pink Guura=Good Flek=Fly And that’s all I’ve done for now! |
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Post by The~Inquisitor on Oct 16, 2003 9:29:24 GMT -5
The suprising twist about him being one of the 8 gods who erased their own memory is no longer a suprise now.
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Atolmazel
RPG Townie
"That's one spicy tamale"
Posts: 650
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Post by Atolmazel on Oct 16, 2003 12:42:32 GMT -5
The suprising twist about him being one of the 8 gods who erased their own memory is no longer a suprise now. Not if you market it to gamingw/rpg2knet. Besides, I'm sure he can just twist it again. |
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Voltaire
RPG Townie
"When you gaze long into the abyss... the abyss also gazes into you." - Frederick Nietzsche
Posts: 55
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Post by Voltaire on Oct 16, 2003 14:56:37 GMT -5
Don't underestimate a cliche storyline. Even if something seems cliche beyond belief at first, it still can throw a few unique ideas or surprises at you. For example, the 'villain is hero's father' has been done in Star Wars, and it was used decently in a few RPGs.
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DOOMshroom
RPG Town Newbie
Da 'shroom of ultimate DOOOOM
Posts: 6
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Post by DOOMshroom on Oct 16, 2003 16:04:45 GMT -5
I agree....I always play a game through even if its cliche to see if there is any great twists. An example of a cliche game with no great twists is Slaying the Dragon of Kingdom Rule.
I like the language thing....I think a race called Leguidonians or something could speak it but you prolly already thought of that
anyway pretty decent story but the whole soldiers flaming your town is pretty overused......I think I'll play it if you follow it through to the end....
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Atolmazel
RPG Townie
"That's one spicy tamale"
Posts: 650
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Post by Atolmazel on Oct 16, 2003 16:56:23 GMT -5
Yes, clichés can be used to great effect, as a false sense of security creator. For the example, the empire VS the rebellion. Make the rebellion evil, for a change.
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Post by EightSlicesOfPie on Oct 24, 2003 17:55:08 GMT -5
Hey...haven't posted in a while. Anyways, I hope no one was looking forward to playing this...because I'm not continuing it.  I started a new game that I haven't thought of a title OR much of a storyline yet, I only started it yesterday! So far, this soldier,[glow=purple,2,300]Rokin[/glow] was supposed to seige a gateway to another continent (They were on Caer D'num, and it led to Caer Sui) with his friend, who was also a soldier, [glow=purple,2,300]Eve[/glow] and they fought General Raig of the Frea Army, and two of his soldiers, they win, and make camp in the forest. While Rokin is talking to Eve, another Frea general, the brother of Raig, Hilaya, fights them. Then, after they beat Hilaya, they decide to tell the King of their victory at the gate. Then they arrive at the castle. That's all I've done. |
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I just wanted to know if anyone liked my storyline. I have the beginning, middle, and end. Here it is! 
I started a new game that I haven't thought of a title OR much of a storyline yet, I only started it yesterday! So far, this soldier,[glow=purple,2,300]Rokin[/glow] was supposed to seige a gateway to another continent (They were on Caer D'num, and it led to Caer Sui) with his friend, who was also a soldier, [glow=purple,2,300]Eve[/glow] and they fought General Raig of the Frea Army, and two of his soldiers, they win, and make camp in the forest. While Rokin is talking to Eve, another Frea general, the brother of Raig, Hilaya, fights them. Then, after they beat Hilaya, they decide to tell the King of their victory at the gate. Then they arrive at the castle. That's all I've done.